I admit, I did it. It wasn't premeditated but second degree murder. I pee-ed on a ferny-type plant and killed it. Guilt of plantslaughter. Honestly, I didn't realise my pee was so lethal. Needless to say, I was sentenced to severe looks of annoyance and anger. Sentenced to not-in-the-good-books. Because of one destructive action. So, from now on, I need to make sure I pee on inanimate objects. Posts, chair legs, table legs, garden pots, brick walls, fences. Funny, when I do p

And I still am. That's me at sixteen weeks. Such a little bundle of gorgeousness. Six years on still the most pearlescent fur especially after I've been to my groomer. Black truffle nose, liquid chocolate eyes, petit perfectly triangulated ears and energetic tail. I have it all. I've put on a few kilos, too many for a while but then she put me on a diet and I lost a few kilos and now I am perfect weight. In fact, I am pretty perfect all round. I am a robust build. I've develo

I heard you missed me. Here I am. I heard someone else say that. Someone in USA called Melania. Yes, I'm over my hissy fit after seeing the AI doggie posts. I can confirm that I am a real live West Highland White Terrier. No AI involved in creating my beautiful white coat, my black truffle nose, my melting chocolate eyes. It's all me. I can eat, drink, walk, run, sniff, bark, sleep, do body shakes, paw tap, lie on my back for tummy tickles, watch TV and growl all on my own wi

Reality has hit hard. I am obsolet e , archaic , outdated, outmoded , fossilized , retro , moth-eaten , defunct , démodé , stone age . I am the Fred Flintstone of the doggie world. It is with a heavy heart that I admit that my blog has had its day. Here am I, the most beautiful, intelligent, loving Westie in the world, and I am communicating with a static photo and some limp words. I am analogue. Let me explain, look at this video https://www.facebook.com/reel/121770823034046

You should see me in action. I can gnaw through a beef pizzle in two hours. My half-brother, Bertie, takes two weeks to polish one off. If you are wondering what is a pizzle, it's the penis of an animal, especially a bull. Others might call it a schlong, sausage, phallus, pee-pee, male member, cock, dick, prick, knob, tool, willy, peter, Johnson. Capisce? When it i s cleaned, stretched and dehydrated it turns into a protein-rich, natural, easy to digest, long-lasting chew for

Humans yearn for unconditional love. It's an ego thing. To be loved for who you are, warts and all, with unquestioning devotion. You can't get that from another human. There has to be a bit of quid pro quo going on. So you placate yourself by believing that a dog gives unconditional love. Selfless, adoring, undemanding love. No strings attached. What tommy-rot! It assumes that we show pure, non-judgmental affection through enthusiastic greetings, licks and following you every

I mean, look at me. A sweet white furry thing with big eyes and a black nose. Curled up in the equally furry white bed. Look how nicely I am art directed as part of the furniture. Patricia Urquiola's Husk chairs. One of her favourite designers, says human mum. Cost a fortune, but only a 50% sale price fortune. She paid full price for me. No discount. No one discounts a pure breed West Highland White Terrier. Eileen Gray coffee table. And who is Eileen Gray, you might ask . Sh

I love driving in the car. I love movement. I love poking my face out of the window and feeling the air whiz past. It's the best. But I...

I know I am an exemplary example of my breed, the West Highland White Terrier. Note my pure white, wiry double coat with a hard outer...

While she toddles off to Sri Lanka - home of many dogs who all look the same and are free to roam the streets - I have been having the...

I am sorry Peggy, you have been my Number One, but I couldn't help myself. There she was with her droopy downy ears and syrupy brown...

I've written 80 blog stories. That's a lot for a Westie who's human mum doesn't take him for a walk every day so my view of the world is...

First, she tried to poison me and that didn't work so she decided to starve me to death. Honestly. When the vet said I was overweight, my...

My legs are typical for a Westie (remembering that I am an exemplar of my breed). My legs are short. On the other hand, my half-brother...

Sometimes I remember back to my Westie mum. She was just like me except bigger because I had just been born. She had big brown eyes just...

This is me after I've had a shower. Talk about rituals. I shower first and then my human mum has her shower and I have to wait for her to...

Several days ago, I was itching and scratching like a Brillo pad trying to clean a baked on fry pan. I couldn't stop. Licking my paws day...

I have just had a session with my groomer and I am looking particularly white. Pearlescent white as I have described previously. When I...

It's summer in my part of the world and it's hot. How to beat the heat? I do my sausage dog stretches on the concrete floor. Sausage dogs...

I was lying on the bed watching a fly bouncing off the walls. Outside it was sunny and blue skies and green leaves. Inside it was just...